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Business and work

12 Comments on Business and work

(woman on ledge of a high building) I have 173,000 unread emails. You tell me what I have to live for.

(boss to employee) I like you, Lenahan. I see in you things I see in myself... in particular, a spiritual quality that recognizes there must be more to human existence than the single-minded accumulation of obscene amounts of wealth at all costs. Which is why I've called you here today: to impress on you the absolute importance of ensuring that spiritual quality never, in any way, shape or form, finds voice in this company.

(epitaph) Here lies James R. Kipplenorten, 1942-2008. He enhanced shareholder value

(man on toilet with phone cradled under shoulder, working on laptop) Define 'workaholic.'

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(late at night, one worker to colleagues) Look, everyone! The RFP fairy is here to finish our proposal!

(one person to a colleague, while a lion-tamer cracks a whip over their heads) I may be dating myself, but I can remember when this wasn't part of the RFP process.

(two people looking at glorious sunset) I look at this, and it fills me with hope that there's some way to monetize it.

(A circle of people surrounds a dead body. One person gives instructions to each member of the team for disposing of the corpse, who turns out to be a facilitator...) ...who, ironically, has apparently just led the most successful team-building exercise in our company's history.

(one caveperson, holding a wheel she has just chiseled, to another) For the last time, NO, I do NOT know what the ROI is on it!

(facilitator to group member) We're brainstorming here, and there are no dumb ideas. But if we WEREN'T brainstorming, that would have been a really, REALLY dumb idea.

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